Know Yourself & Your Relationship Patterns
After your break-up, take some time to introspect and figure out why your ex left. What drove him/her away? It must’ve been something big for your ex to call off the relationship. Were you in any way responsible for the split? If so, now’s the time to learn from your mistakes, to grow as a person…
While introspecting, make sure to see things from your ex’s perspective as well. You might be surprised by what you come to realize! Use this period to focus on yourself. As someone once said, retrospect and then introspect… The most important thing is to learn from your mistakes and take responsibility for them.
That doesn’t mean you beat yourself up over something you said or did. Try looking at the past as objectively as possible and reach out to your ex to say you’re sorry… But if you feel your ex was largely at fault, consciously try to forgive him/her. Usually, it takes two hands to clap and two people to mess up a relationship. If you realize that’s the case, own up to your mistakes. But don’t expect your ex to do the same or you may end up getting disappointed or angry.
During this difficult phase, remind yourself that even this will pass. You’ll be fine. It’s just a matter of time… Having faith in a higher power helps since you trust that you’ll be taken care of and know that whatever has happened has happened for a reason. This belief is the beginning of growth and awareness emotional, spiritual and mental.
Try to see the break-up as an opportunity to become a stronger person. When you’re in a crisis, that’s when you realize how strong you really are and you learn to tap into that inner strength. This would be a good time to study your relationship patterns. Do you have unrealistic expectations? Are you always going for the wrong type of person? Do you fear commitment? Do you let your partner walk all over you? Or are you dominating? Knowing your patterns will enable you to change them, so you don’t end up repeating the same mistakes.
While it’s natural to feel sad and upset after a break-up, it’s also important to move towards positivity and growth after the initial grieving period. Look for the silver lining. And open your heart, mind and soul to inner growth…